A recent study by professors at San Diego State finds that today’s college students are narcissist. Over 16,000 college students filled out a questionnaire to measure their NPI score (Narcissistic Personality Inventory). “The NPI test divides narcissism into seven components: superiority, exhibitionism, entitlement, vanity, authority, exploitiveness and self-sufficiency.” (Pinsky)
The study asserts that narcissists “are more likely to have romantic relationships that are short-lived, at risk for infidelity, lack emotional warmth, and to exhibit game-playing, dishonesty, and over-controlling and violent behaviors.”
“Current technology fuels the increase in narcissism,” Twenge said. “By its very name, MySpace encourages attention-seeking, as does YouTube.” From CNN
Our ability to create personal blogs and webpages, to post videos and photos of ourselves where others can see them, to create a position for ourselves (however small it may be) in the world of global media is a powerful thing. We no longer have to accept anonymity in the crowd. However, I’m not so sure that these kinds of participatory media necessarily make us narcissistic. Perhaps we feel a sense of agency, of ability to make ourselves heard, or even the power to affect change. Is that being full of ourselves? Certainly not in every case.
If feeling like I have important things to say that I want to share with others makes me narcissist then I’ll wear the label with pride and hope that others follow suit.
The NPI asks questions such as
- “If I ruled the world, it would be a better place”
- “I think I am a special person”
- “I can live my life any way I want to.”
While we should hope that we’re not raising a generation of folks hell-bent on world domination, I see nothing wrong with people feeling “special” or believing in their ability to shape their own lives. There seems to be a disconnect (from what I can find about the NPI…if you know more help me out here) between the narcissism that Pinsky talks about and the kind of self-esteem issues dealt with in the NPI found. Here are the NPI questions…see for yourself (from Raskin and Terry).
- I would prefer to be a leader.
- I see myself as a good leader.
- I will be a success.
- People always seem to recognize my authority.
- I have a natural talent for influencing people.
- I am assertive.
- I like to have authority over other people.
- I am a born leader.
- I rarely depend on anyone else to get things done.
- I like to take responsibility for making decisions.
- I am more capable than other people.
- I can live my life in any way I want to.
- I always know what I am doing.
- I am going to be a great person.
- I am an extraordinary person.
- I know that I am good because everybody keeps telling me so.
- I like to be complimented.
- I think I am a special person.
- I wish somebody would someday write my biography.
- I am apt to show off if I get the chance.
- Modesty doesn’t become me.
- I get upset when people don’t notice how I look when I go out in public.
- I like to be the center of attention.
- I would do almost anything on a dare.
- I really like to be the center of attention.
- I like to start new fads and fashions.
- I can read people like a book.
- I can make anybody believe anything
- I want them to.
- I find it easy to manipulate people.
- I can usually talk my way out of anything.
- Everybody likes to hear my stories.
- I like to look at my body.
- I like to look at myself in the mirror.
- I like to display my body.
- I will never be satisfied until I get all that I deserve.
- I expect a great deal from other people.
- I want to amount to something in the eyes of the world.
- I have a strong will to power.
- I insist upon getting the respect that is due me.
- If I ruled the world it would be a much better place.
From what I’ve been able to find, the real difference between confidence and narcissism is an imbalance between how you see yourself and how you think others see you. It’s the difference between looking in the mirror at your slightly overweight body and saying “I’m fat and that’s perfect!” (narcissistic) and “I’m fat. I know I could be thinner but I’m happy with who I am” (self-esteem). If you’re in denial that others might see you differently than you see yourself, or if you see yourself in an idealized way that denies the facts you might be narcissist. So it boils down to a lack of ability to take others’ views of you into account. So now let’s think back to this idea that the internet breeds narcissists.
Argue with me on this if you disagree but it seems to me that the internet does just the opposite. Sites like Hot or Not, Facebook etc allow people to be brutally honest about you or to easily show their affection for the “you” that they see. You may think that video of you dancing in your bedroom is a real smash but the five hits you got on YouTube should tell you the opposite. Easy feedback systems like this, feedback made of quantitative clear information, should help combat an incompatibility between perception and reality.
Of course, if we let ourselves think about the constructed, and often fictional, identities and egos that some use in virtual worlds like Second Life…well that’s a blog for another day.